Oh, one last thing. What is it that I want?

I want to stand up on a stage. Or even just in a room. And play. And when I finish, be able to say that was the best I could have done. I gave it my all. I had nothing left to give, I'm not capable of anything else. My preparation was the best it could have been. There was nothing else to be done. In that moment. Or in the lead up.

No excuses. Not hiding behind anything outside of myself. Accepting what I did, and hopefully being proud. On top of that, hopefully it will be great. I want to do something no one else has done before.

Finally. Not being scared to fail. To give my all and to not be afraid of being found wanting.